Some Do Battle, Others Just Do Tricks Chap. II

Chapter II: Take Me Out to the Ballgame

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“Now this is a proper baseball field,” Steve said as the group found their seats a few rows behind home base.

“God bless the Cubs and their nostalgia,” Darcy said.

“Especially their losing streak,” Clint said.

“I do not recall blessing baseball,” Loki said before being smacked by Darcy.

“Don’t be hating on my Cubbies,” Jane said. She was still walking normally, but was recognizably pregnant. Thor was taking extra care of her.

Natasha said, “At least the White S…”

“Say one word about that team and I’ll bring up the 1919 World Series,” Jane said.

“That shall be difficult as your precious Cubbies are playing against the White Sox,” Loki said.

“Do I want to know why you’re wearing a Blackhawks hat?” Steve asked, trying to change the touchy subject.

“Because this rivalry is trifling and baseball is boring. Hockey is a fascinating way Midgardians let out their desire for bloodshed without there being casualties,” Loki said.

“Loki, have you ever been to a live baseball game?” Natasha asked.

“No,” Loki said.

“Then shut up and watch the game,” Natasha said.

The game was close throughout. The White Sox fans were Natasha and Clint (with Stark sending pro-Sox Tweets throughout the game). Darcy, Jane, Thor, and Steve were rooting for the Cubs. Loki mocked everyone and may or may not have caused players to slip on the field during pauses in the game.

After the seventh inning stretch, Steve mentioned catching a homerun baseball at a Dodgers game.

Jane commented, “I always thought that would be awesome. I mean, I couldn’t catch it since I run away from things flying at my head, but having one caught by someone I went to a game with would be great.”

“You never have?” Thor asked.

“No. It doesn’t happen that often and I haven’t been to that many games,” Jane said.

“Well, maybe this one,” Thor said.

Loki yawned. “I’ll be back. I cannot handle this drivel any longer unless I move or I set something on fire.”

“That would be Disco Night,” Clint said.

Towards the bottom of the ninth inning, a foul ball went off into the stands. A tall, dark haired woman in mini-shorts and a cleavage showing top caught the baseball. She flicked her curly hair and blew a kiss at the camera.

Thor doubled over in his seat from laughing uproariously. Every time someone asked what was wrong, he would just start laughing harder. Jane rubbed his back and that calmed Thor enough to finish watching the game.

After the baseball game had finished with the Cubs as the victors, the group waited for Loki to meet up with them at their gate.

“Where is that jerk?” Clint said.

“Yoo-hoo!” The brunette who caught the foul waved to the group. She strutted over in her high heels and gave Clint a kiss on the cheek. “Did you miss me, Agent Barton?”

Clint’s eyes got wide and Thor was laughing hysterically again. The women were snickering while Steve was trying very hard to not laugh.

“You… you… you’re a girl!” Clint said.

“Your sight does not deceive you, Clint,” Loki said.

“I thought that was a false story,” Jane said, wiping tears from her eyes.

Lady Loki pulled down her top to show off more cleavage. “No, Jane. I can shape shift to most forms. This form has… benefits the others do not. Such as…” She handed a signed baseball to Jane.

“Loki! Thank you!” Jane said.

“I had the whole team sign it and even got a few phone numbers,” Loki said, holding up scraps of paper, “Darcy, Natasha, do you wish to split these ups? A couple of them were decent enough looking men.”

Darcy gaped at Loki. Natasha responded in the negative. Barton looked to be in shock.

“Do you do this often, Loki?” Steve asked.

“Yes,” Thor said. He was clutching his side as he continued laughing. “Your face, Barton.”

Clint straightened up. “It’s just an illusion.”

“Oh, Mr. Barton, I may have pulled some things in and pushed some things out, but this is 100% me,” Loki said, sliding up against Clint. “Would you like to test my honesty?”

“Now, Loki, Barton is not going to do that,” Steve said.

Loki sighed. Steve whispered something in Lady Loki’s ear before Loki nodded in approval. Steve then kissed Loki (with tongue) tilting Loki backwards. When they pulled apart, Steve said, “Yep. Real. Definitely real.”

“Captain, if only I knew you had it in you,” Loki said before winking.

Steve was blushing now. “I can’t have a lady’s honesty question.” He elbowed Loki. “If this gets out, I’ll make you wish the Hulk smashed you.”

“Of course, Steve, dear,” Loki said.

“Come on. Let’s make our way to the car,” Natasha said.

“Oh, Jane,” Lady Loki said as they began to walk, “I have another gift for the little one.”

Loki handed Jane an eight-legged horse plush toy. Thor started laughing again but refused to confirm or deny if the myth was true.

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Over the next two months, Loki gave a plush toy wolf, salmon, and a stuffed animal spider that was two feet wide. Jane accepted the weirdness of the salmon. The spider was banished to the closet due to Thor’s strong distaste for arachnids. (He was quick to assure it was not a phobia, even if Jane had to kill all the spiders in the apartment and Tony had more than one video of Thor giving a high pitched scream at the sight of an eight-legged fiend.)